Posts Tagged ‘ Japan ’

Girl Scout Shenanigans!

As a kid I was always excited when the Girl Scout cookies would show up at my house. I loved the small colored boxes with those delicious cookies inside…except those ones with coconut, they tasted like shit! I haven’t bought Girl Scout cookies in years and I want to tell you why! All kids groups… Indian Guides, Boy Scouts, Girl Scouts all had some type of product to sell to the neighborhood to raise funds for to pay for activities throughout the year. As a Boy Scout myself we sold Christmas wreathes and garlands. The money was the most important thing but second was the lesson learned of working and going door to door to sell our product. Besides the Boy Scout stuff I did the same thing for Cystic Fibrosis and magazine sales in Middle School. I walked my neighborhood after school, usually the kids who sold the most got some kind of prize. The CF one was the best, I won a 12″ black & white TV one year and an Oddesey 2 game system the next for having raised the most money! In 1980 this was a huge deal considering kids then didn’t have TVs in their bedrooms let alone a video game system too!! Every spoiled brat has this kind of stuff  today, but back then it was unheard of.

Fast forward to 2111. A girl scout hasn’t showed up on my doorstep in about 15 years or so. I wish one would because I really like those cookies! The only kids who ever come door to door are kids from the inner city who sell gummi bears for 8 bucks a box. I buy them every time for the simple reason that they got off their asses and are at least trying to do something productive. The Girl Scouts in my neighborhood obviously don’t share the same work ethic as the dirty ghetto kids. The Girl Scouts have chosen a different and much lazier business plan. I walk into the supermarket or coffee shop and am immediately shanghaied by the parents of the Girl Scouts who sit at a strategically placed table right by the front door. The parents do the sales pitch as their spoon-fed kids sit around and chit chat and text with their friends. “Would you like to buy some cookies?” with a big prozac smile, I say “no thank you” but feeling like saying, “Get those lazy little bitches off their asses and make THEM go door to door and sell the fuckin’ cookies!!”

I have talked to others about this and have been told “it’s different times than when we were kids…there’s too many weirdos nowadays”…BULLSHIT! Even though it didn’t get the dramatic headlines like it does today there have always been creeps in this world and the odds of something happening to a child are as low as they were in the 1950’s. I would never minimize crimes against children but the whole “the boogieman is everywhere” mentality is wrong and very sad!! Shame on the parents who follow this way of thought, your kids are growing up to be lazy, entitled, and fearful of the wonderful world we live in.  Hopefully some brave Girl Scout will come to my door so we can order some fuckin’ cookies, but I doubt it!



I woke up my wife a few nights ago so she could see what I was seeing on CNN. I stayed up till nearly 4 am watching live footage of Japan being destroyed by the huge earthquake and following tsunami. The water was unreal, a disaster movie unfolded in real life…heartbreaking. Days later shit just gets worse, as they try to rescue survivors and recover the dead the threat of nuclear meltdown looms from more than one power plant.

The thing I notice is that the Japanese seem to be an amazing culture! The scope of this disaster is larger than anything to happen here in America yet the Japanese seem clam and dignified. They never seem to ask for help but are grateful for any aid.

The only thing I can compare this earthquake to is Hurricane Katrina. The hurricane was terrible but what was worse was events that transpired after and American behavior. I watch the news  and wonder why aren’t the Japanese looting the stores? Why aren’t the Japanese motherfuckin’ the government for not taking care of them with money and free housing? Why aren’t they trampling each other for food and water…they stand in line and wait their turn? Why aren’t they killing each other…like the Americans did??? My quick answer: Because they don’t act like fuckin’ entitled spoiled fuckin’ babies! Shame on us America!

I am praying for the Japanese people and I hope the world can learn from your example of keeping your shit together and respecting each other in the face of total destruction. You are a brave and dignified people and have the respect of me and hopefully the rest of the world!